Found this piece of paper in last year's journal. Quotes from "Love In The Time of Cholera" by G.G.M.

"...he is ugly and sad..but he is all love"
"what most struck Hildebranda was her cousin's solitude. She seemed she told her an old maid of twenty."
"Life was imposed on her from the outside"
"....what they would eat, what they would buy, what had to be done in every circumstance, and in that way she determined a life in a house where in reality nothing had to be determined."
"....a more amusing way to kill time..."
"...the affection ends...."

so apparently last year, I was interested in unfortunate looking and depressing boys, because I felt I was already an oldmaid, being suffocated by the world, doing things I pushed upon myself all to more skillfully amuse myself.

no i really don't know why these were written down, but why not take a stab at it.