that day when you feel like everything is impossible. when you can't cry. when you can't relax. 18 conversations are bouncing back and forth inside your skull. and your spine is made of rusty bolts and screws. pinching. squeaking. may as well just be a robot. and every burden hits at once and suddenly nothing makes you feel. zombie. and you doubt everything. and you just can't muster up the energy to compare the day to yellow and bunnies to avoid making them feel awkward. yet everything isn't that bad you think. you have this and that and they love you and think you're wonderful and God's there even if you don't believe it and it'll pass and all the other words that make up a pat on the back, but it doesn't comfort, just makes your body echo and remind you that you're paralyzed. and you know that it's just one day so why can't you shake it off? and the feeling's so awful you won't attempt to dress it up with alliteration and rhymes. it's awful and it should stay that way. or that's just how you feel and you know you're probably wrong and will regret this all next week because they'll know, after you carelessly rambled, that you aren't always gleamingly perfect. but this is real and it hurts and that won't be compromised.